But the older a child is, the more likely they are to notice any changes, and hence, need to be engaged in them and given the opportunity to take ownership of them.

The children in our program have homework assignments that are both educational and behavioral, and they involve getting the child to make healthy choices on their own, so that they become invested in those decisions.

Does that mean Mom and Dad are off the hook? By no means. There is another feature of the parents’ program followed in the research study that’s proven successful in our full family-based approach.

Parents are encouraged to practice an “authoritative” parenting style, in which they offer their children a kind of leadership by example, and model appropriate eating and activity, as opposed to an “authoritarian” style, which would be that old “do as I say because I said so,” approach.

With older kids and teenagers, the parents are still crucial as an authoritative model, but the teen needs to take some responsibility too, and not just as a compliant participant.

A maturing child should be given a meaningful role, e.g. planning the family menu for the week, or deciding what physical activities
they will engage in.  The parents are still laying down the ground rules, but older kids and teens need to feel some ownership of the process and the goal.

As with many other things, you can’t just tell a teenager to go exercise.  It takes some finesse, and some respect for the child’s role in choosing. For example, by asking “How much do you want to lose this week?” we offer the child a controlling role.

By asking what activity or exercise they’ll do to make that happen, we’ve started them on the first step of their own activity plan.

And if they come up with nothing they are willing to do, we let them know that they need to change their goal, because they probably won't lose any weight that week. 

But all of those decisions are controlled by the child or teen. That kind of ownership is far more likely to lead to planning and follow-through than a parent’s orders, or even gentle instructions.

Play together, weigh together

Other recent research on children and body weight shows a direct correlation between kids’ weight and the amount of time they spent in recreational physical activity with their families.

We see much in the media about the loss of physical education programs in schools, but these opportunities for exercise and activity don’t have as strong a correlation with kids’ weight as what they do with their parents.

That could be because we learn our values from our families, typically, not our schools. Even if kids sit around in school all day and go home to enjoy a bike ride with the family, they’re far more likely to see themselves as active, to have a positive attitude about physical recreation and to participate in it with others.

When it comes to weight-management issues with younger children, treating mom and dad to nutritional education, parenting guidance and sound medical advice helps the grown-ups take care of the problem, so that kids just end up with the solution.

But for older children and teens, they need to know that not only are they responsible for participating, they’re actually capable of coming up with the solution themselves.

But walks might become a part of the day, sweets and treats become special occasion foods, and healthy snacking options start to be available.

Caroline J. Cederquist, M.D. is a board certified Bariatric Physicians, the medical specialty of weight management, and a board certified Family Physician. She specializes in lifetime weight management at the Cederquist Medical Wellness Center, her Naples, FL private practice.

Dr. Cederquist is a contributing medical editor for NBC-2 News, a trustee of the American Society Of Bariatric Physicians and the author of " Helping Your Overweight Child - A Family Guide", www.Amazon.Com or by Calling Toll-Free 1-800-431-1579.

If you are interested in a delicious, doctor-designed, foolproof plan for fast and healthy weight loss please visit Dr. Cederquist's Diet-To-Your-Door program by clicking here.

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